The Good, The Bad and the God Awful Ugly!

                    Crappy romantic comedies need the big speech at the end of the film by the main character (the boy) losing the one they're chasing (the girl). It basically wraps up the whole movie in barely 30 seconds - which is disturbing to how much these producers are paying for a whole movie production! You'd think they'd want every minute to mean something - but every minute before that speech is there so when the old western stand off style, horrible acting, waaay too much make-up MONOLOGUE SPEECH happens you know what the hell mister beautiful is talking about.

                    The audience believes this guy's world has changed for this women when all he did in the first place was not want her to date some OTHER IDIOT when how the hell does he have the right to says he's the best candidate for her?  Oh I know because he's sensitive, lives with his grandma, doesn't cheat in life and plays the guitar for kids with cancer. Right.

                    But this is what the people want! Because if it wasn't want we wanted, then the film 'INDUSTRY' wouldn't make those types of stupid, lifeless endings! Because lets face it. The film business is a BUSINESS! Not a cute movie set with artsy farsty artists trying to make a change. The "big cats" want to suck the system dry while the "small kittens" just want to imitate life. Sound familiar? Its what separates then 3 stars from the "why the hell did I just spend two hours watching that screen project images of steaming dog crap?!"

                    The good romantic comedies that don't have those 5th grade fantasy tale monologues have ending monologues.  Just like the crappy ones.

                    But as my readers, you always know there are two sides to everything. A good and a horrible (not 'bad' because critics will always be... blood sucking critics (; ). The forsaken and the forgotten. But you say Louie... what's your point here ? How do we know we're not getting spoon fed processed food when all we see is floppy and happy go lucky blonde have flirtatious nonsense with a side of hazardous  comedy?


                    Well for one thing, romance IS NOT FUNNY! It's deteriorating, draining, life changing, journey crushing, perceptions that yield to INSANITY! When did you ever hear your friend tell his horrific break up story break into comedic sparkle in his tale? NEVER!

SO! To review: Crappy romantic comedies have wonderful, understanding, truthful, witty and funny monologues! :D ( PLEASE NOTE: strong hint of sarcasm ) While the successful and inspiring romantic pictures have them as well! but you say! Louie, please explain this MADNESS!


                    When these monologues DO actually happen in these, great romantic films, you don't even know they're happening! Because your desperately listening and waiting for thar pure feeling you've never seen in action! Instead of saying "oh this is where the idiot admits he's an idiot to the girl he just wants to bang then wins 'the big game' and she falls in his arms because he's so cute and 'I forgive you!'."


                    From the beginning of the film you honestly believe that this man deserves a partner in crime, someone to share his adventures through life. We see he's not looking for a perfect girl to compliment is "cool" life. We see how his heart yearns for this women when a week ago he was dying inside slowly. He doesn't want to be her everything, he doesn't want to live a fulfilling life with her. He NEEDS all of it! And if he doesn't get her. All else fails.

                    This is what makes a picture great! The fact that the audience sees themselves in this character. The character who can't go on without her. The character who shows exactly what you were feeling 3 months ago when 'she' got away. When he couldn't see you like you see him.

                    The desperate need for their love presents itself on the screen so vividly that when you leave the theater, you've transformed into another realm but always keeping your heart and soul grounded so that YOU the VIEWER examine a deeper meaning of one self.

                    These films. They TEACH us... ladies and gentlemen. They give us hope, sorrow, pain and resentment. But they will always give you truth.